I Don't Square Dance!

Okay, so yesterday afternoon, in the middle of cooking a new recipe (Chicken and Eggplant Parmesan at Mike and Ariel's request), the Bishop calls, and me being the fool that I am, I answered.

I *thought* he just needed to tell Mike something.

Well, he did, but it also involved ME!

Here is part of the conversation:

Bishop: Hello Sis. Odom.

Me: Hi Bishop.

Bishop: I'm just calling to remind you that we have Square Dancing practice tonight at 6pm.

Okay, let me stop here. Did my ears just hear the words "WE". What??? I don't square dance (no offense to those who finds joy in this, it's just not for me).

Back to conversation:

Me: What?? What do you mean "we" have square dancing practice.

Bishop: Did Mike not tell you that he volunteered you and him to be part of a square dance performance that the Bishopric and their wives will be putting on?

Me: Ughh...no, he did not and probably because he KNOWS that I would say NO. I don't square dance.

Bishop: Well, too late now (he was kind of chuckling while saying this). You're square dancing and practice is at 6pm.

Okay, let me stop again because for the next 5 minutes I began to try to convince myself and the Bishop that he was playing some kind of cruel joke on me and he should stop. It wasn't funny after the 1st minute. He could just give me the message he had for Mike, and we could end the conversation, and I could get back to lightly browning my eggplant.

But no, he wasn't kidding. I finally heard his wife yell in the background, "Andrea, he's not kidding. "

Okay, do you know how those 3 words--he's not kidding--- totally changed me.

Finally, the Bishop said, "Go call your husband, and we'll see you at 6."

I said, "Well, I can't I have a presidency meeting at 6:30. Sorry."

He said, "Well that's okay because practice is at 6!"

Talk about persistence.

I thought it wouldn't help to tell him I was in the middle of cooking a new recipe that was taking a little longer than I thought, and I didn't think I would make it by 6. So I didn't bother.

When I heard the door chime as Mike entered the house from work, I said, "What's this I hear about you volunteering US to square dance."

Mike: (Acting a little confused) HUH?

Me: Come on Mike don't play dumb, the Bishop said that the Bishopric and their wives were all doing a square dance routine."

Mike: "Oh that. He mentioned it a few weeks ago in a meeting for Pioneer Day, but I told him that I don't square dance, and I haven't thought about it since. I guess he did not take that as a no."

Me: "What? Did you tell him that I am the most uncoordinated person on earth? Did you tell him that I don't dance, and I try not to put myself in situations to purposely be humiliated?"

Mike: "No, because as I said, I told him that I don't square dance, end of conversation. But come on, he's seen us dance together. He knows we can dance."

Okay, let me stop again. I don't dance. I like, I guess I should say love, to dance "fancy" with Mike, but for the most part I am a work in progress, and Mike pulls ,or maybe I should say drags, me along. Really, he does. He's far better than I am, and he makes it look effortless. Over the years, I have managed to learn to follow better, but trust me I don't dance.

Let me explain how bad of a dancer I am. About 8 or 9 years ago the R.S. put on a talent show, and I was the secretary. The R.S. President said that she thought we all should do something in the show because we were putting on the event. Her idea: We should all Square Dance.

Okay, the key word mind you is that we were putting on a "Talent" show. I don't consider square dancing my talent.

My friend Susan was also in the R.S. Presidency and we both agreed we did not want to square dance, so we decided to do something else, and leave the square dancing to them. What did we decide to do? Sing. Now, I don't have TALENT as a singer either (just trust me on this, please don't make me prove it to you, your ears will hate you for it), but this should tell you that I would rather humiliate myself singing than to humiliate myself square dancing (something I have not done since I was forced to in elementary school).

Let me stop and say Susan can sing. I don't want to categorize her with my lack of talent.

And, I do have to say that Susan and I was able to pull off the singing/karaoke thing. What did we sing, you ask? "My Baby Loves Me " by Martina McBride. Some people even thought we lip synched---which we did not. However, I think I will end any singing career right there with that. Trust me, for me, that night, was pure luck...nothing more. How do I know?---when I was in the 5th grade, and my class sang in the Christmas program, the girl next to me told me to just move my lips. True story. Need I say more?

But to this day, I'm still glad I sang over Square Dancing.

I guess it's pride, and you know what they say about that.....it cometh before the fall. That's what I'm afraid of--falling--Flat on my face in front of a room full of people.

However, I did realized that perhaps I was over reacting a bit. I mean how bad could it be.

Maybe I would come to enjoy it and it would be fun. Maybe...

Maybe I need to take one for the team. Maybe...

So, what did I do? I quickly finished the dinner, which smelled delicious, by the way. Smelled being the key word again, because we did not have time to eat it (guess what's for dinner tonight?). By the time dinner was done, and I cleaned up the kitchen (sorry, can't leave dishes in the sink and messy counter tops. Just can't do it.), it was time to leave.

Can I just say, the Lord is good. He really is. When we got to church (yes, we were a few minutes late---I had to clean the kitchen) the person who was teaching us square dancing had forgotten all about it! So the Bishop said, I guess we won't do it then.

HOORAY for forgetfulness!

I told you, "I don't square dance". LOL.