Opening Up My Own Heart

For those of you that read my last post you might be able to tell what last weekend was like for my family, well for the most part. For those of you who did not, I guess I could say I was not in the best of moods.

Have you ever had times when people (even those you love) just get on your nerves for no particular reason? That was me this past weekend.

By Sunday afternoon, I realized I needed to have a little escape. So what did I do? Probably not what most good Mormon mom's would do, especially on a Sunday afternoon. Many would have turned to their scriptures, prayer, uplifting music, or the Ensign etc.

Nope, not me. I turned to my favorite blogs.

Luckily, the Lord is watching over me because the first blog I went to was Susan's. I really do love her blog. She is such a fun, smart and kind person. She is one of my best friends who can usually get me out of bad moods. Since it was Sunday, I did not want to call...

So I checked out her blog. I skimmed over the blog stalker confession again, and looked at her burrito recipe (which I am going to make soon), and then I came to the one that started to get me where I needed to be again. The one titled "A Heart Like His". Susan often says exactly what I need to hear at any given time, and on this day, she did it in words. Her last sentence read this: "So if your heart is feeling a little "closed, small, or hard" pick up a copy of this book (or just ask me and you can borrow it). "

The funny thing is that she let me borrow "A Heart Like His" on Thursday when we were at her house visiting. I brought it home, and put it on a table where it sat until Sunday afternoon. I felt prompted to shut off the computer, go get the book, wipe off the dust (sorry Susan), and start reading. It's was just what I needed.

I read half of the book in just one sitting. I could feel my heart beginning to open up (obviously, not all the way though because I did post the family pet peeves. Hey, give a girl a break, I'm human, but at least I'm trying.--Oh, and thanks to the Hurst for your comment. Your advice was great, and works well. LOL. )

However, like so many of my blogs this first part is not the reason for this post, well not the full reason. (I'm starting to believe Mike when he says that I talk too much, and can go from one topic to the next without taking a breath).

So what's the full reason? While I was reading this book, someone kept coming to my mind. A perfect example of someone who truly has a "heart like His". While I read, the examples Sis. Pearce gave kept making me think of this sister in my ward.

Then I came to this little exercise Sis. Pearce challenges readers to do (throughout the book, she give small challenges). Here is what the first challenge I decided to do says: "Jot down the names of some of the people you know who consistently seem to affirm, validate, motivate, and nourish those around them. Look beyond family and close friends. Think about ward members, neighbors, co-workers. Is it the words they say, or is it something more powerful? Think of a specific encounter with such a person. Write or tell someone about it. "

So, I'm going to write about this sister here, on my blog. However, I will not state her name because she does not know I am doing this, and may not want her name on the WWW. But I will say this much for those of you who are curious, she has the coolest Louisiana Cajun accent in Mobile. (Smiles). For the sake of confusion, I'll call her Sis. A.

Let me start off by saying Sis. A is not someone I know as well as I wish I did. For the most part we only see each other at church activities.

So I'll tell you what I do know. She is a lady who loves the Lord, knows her scriptures, is constantly about "Lord's business", fulfills her callings, is always servings others, and she definitely affirms, validates, motivates, and nourishes those around her. How do I know?

Her love for the Lord radiates from her. One can not help but be near her, and not see her light shining. That's what draws me to her. When I look at her, I see the Savior. I really do. It's like that song by Janice Kapp Perry, "His Image in Your Countenance."

I love to hear Sis. A give a talk. She does not read, she speaks from her heart, with the spirit as her guide. Every time she speaks, my heart is made fuller. Through the spirit, she encourages me to be better, and she is humble (something that I definitely need to learn more about).

Let me give you a few examples of how she has touched my heart. When I was called to be the Gospel Doctrine teacher for our ward a few years back, I was terrified. I actually begged them not to call me (I really did). I gave them suggestions of other peoples names. But I was told that I was the one the Lord wanted at that time. How could I say no to that? Well, I could not.

I am not a born teacher. I don't have a talent for this, nor the patience really. And I'm definitely not a "scriptorian". I was so scared of the thought to have to teach others, who I knew understood the scriptures much better than me.

Not to put myself on the level of an ancient prophet, or any prophet for that matter, because I'm no where near there, but I felt like Moses, and I needed my own Aaron.

My second week of teaching, Sis. A, whom I admire, gave me a copy of two talks. She said something to the effect that she thought they might help me. If I truly want to be honest, at first my feelings were hurt because I felt that she was confirming what I already knew, "I stinked at teaching."

However, I quickly realized that is not why she gave me those talks.

There was a difference in her and I. Here's the difference. My heart had become closed. I was full of pride. I worried more about what people were thinking, than what the Lord thought of me.
Heavenly Father knew this calling was what I needed, and that I could learn and grown from it. I have to say, out of all the callings I've had in the church, I think I learned the most from that one. It was exactly what I needed at that time in my life. Another testimony for me that the Lord does indeed know me and my needs.

My heart began to open as I began to read those talks, and I realized she gave me those talks out of love. Her HEART WAS OPEN--like His. She was "being an instrument in the hands of the Lord."

One of the talks was on teaching by the spirit and being prepared (sorry, I can't remember the title...I told you I have a bad memory. I know I have the talk somewhere here, I'm just too lazy to get up and find it) ,and the other one was entitled, "What Think Ye of Christ" by C. Max Caldwell. I remember the latter because that talk had a profound effect on me, and changed my spirit. I still think about it at least once a week.

I never told Sis. A how much I appreciated the love she gave me at this difficult time in my life. She always participated in my lessons, and was a great strength to me.

Let me give you another example of how Sis. A has a "heart like His". Just recently, one of the sisters I visit teach had a baby, and was in need of some meals to be brought in to her family. So, I started calling other sisters in my ward for help. Let me tell you, this was not an easy task. Many people were out of town, or could not help for some reason or the other.

Two days later, I still needed two meals. I was beginning to become desperate and felt hopeless. Then I called Sis. A. When I asked her, she did not hesitate. She was more than willing to serve this other sister and her family even though she did not know her.

I'm wrong, she did know her. She knew that she was a child of God in need of help, as was I. And she willingly accepted the call to serve.

The words at the end of our conversation is what really "opened my heart" though. I will always remember this part of our conversation. It went something like this:

Me: Thank you so much for helping me out. I hope you have a wonderful day.

Sis. A, in an uplifting and sincere voice: It got better (her day) when you called.

Isn't that wonderful that her day was better because someone called, and gave her an opportunity to serve? I love that, and want to be like that. Isn't that what the Savior would want us to be like.

That response was so different than many others I called upon, and it will forever stick out in my mind. Isn't it strange how one sentence spoken can have such an effect on someone else's heart. To cause them to have a change, a change of heart. Now that's a miracle, and it happened to me that day.

If you read this far, I hope you can say that your heart has been lifted.

As I sit here typing, I know mine has. The funny thing about opening your heart--once you do---as Sis. Pearce quoted from The Grinch, it "grows three sizes bigger". It's contagious. You can't help but think of other good things or people and then want to do good yourself. If you don't believe me, try it.

Thinking of Sis. A reminds me of another sweet sister---Susan's mother-in-law. She too has a "heart like His". I'll never forget the time in Grovehill, AL when she sat up with me and Ann J. at a R.S. "weekend retreat", and talked to us until 2:30am. That weekend, I felt a bit out of place, until she came and took me under her wing. She will probably never know how much I needed that, and how much it meant to me. I will forever treasure that memory.

Anyway, I know there are many who have "Hearts Like His." And for those people I am grateful. They encourage me to be better. To be kinder, love more, serve more, and to be a better wife and mother.

To those of you who have a "Heart Like His", thank you. I'm not quite there, but I do believe I'm getting closer.